a brief timeline of my time in san francisco
11XX masonic: jul 08 – jun 09 (~1 year) – adjusting to post-college life, working life, consulting life. city life with extremely fun, great housemates who were friends from college.
2XX sansome: jun 09 – jul 10 (~1.25 years) – moved in with my first serious boyfriend, also from my first okcupid date. alternating domestic bliss with domestic tedium/tension. and cats!!!!
7XX commercial: jul 10 – feb 14 (~3.5 years) – my short but incredibly intense love affair with party cat, whipping the house from a drug den into livable shape and vanquishing the evil claudia, truly learning what it’s like to truly be independent, more roommates than i can count, gaywakening and dating sean and daniel.
1XX brannan: march 14 onward – who knows!!!!
because of my obsession with the past:
leaving 736 makes me feel…
….nostalgic for parting ways from a house where i have met an above average number of housemates who have provided an extraordinary number of laughs and good memories. because the interview process requires you to create a strong rapport within 5 minutes, the roommates have overall been an incredibly funny group. i am constantly in awe of how socially competent and hilarious everyone in the house is. highlights include zach, who ran the sf marathon and played in HBFS with me, and white james. and margaret. and mars. and the other zach. really great people who i will miss dearly.
…relieved to not have to deal with housing drama or housing responsibilities. no more mediation requests between housemates, trying to talk things over with angry people, getting money from people who don’t have it. and–most importantly, i don’t have to buy dozens of eggs each week to satisfy mason’s dozen egg a day egg consumption (which is “normal” for him).
…more mature for the personal growth that i experienced while living there. living in commercial was the first time i was forced to be self-sufficient. my sister helped me move to college and to SF, and chris helped me move to fidi. i still remember that warm summer day when i was moving to commerical; my room was too small to assemble my wardrobe and i was worried about the fact that the head tenant was a drug dealer (i later heisenberg-ed him). i accidentally locked myself out later that afternoon and had a panic attack and crumbled on the sidewalk, close to tears, wondering what the FUCK i was doing and how i was going to get through this by myself.
and the last 3 years, i personally have seen tremendous personal growth and become much more confident, resilient, and capable. the house provided ample opportunity for learning how to resolve conflict. i became comfortable with my sexuality and radically changed my social identity, circles, and activities. i learned how to date. i learned how to make friends. i got better at smalltalk and creating a rapport with people i have never met. it is remarkable the sort of growth you can achieve by starting from a blank slate, with new housemates, new friends, and a new life. other than college, this was probably my greatest period of personal change.
…insignificant and powerless for not being the head tenant anymore. one of the reasons why i never cared about getting paid from the landlord for all my extra work was that… it felt really great having power. to matter to people. and it’s scary giving away my “baby” to mason (who has radically different approaches to how he plans to manage the house, both for better and for worse). which i hate somewhat because i’m just jealous that it’s different from what i used to do and because it doesn’t matter what i like anymore. i also get annoyed/angry/defensive when mason questions how i used to run the house.
…worldly for having encountered so many people from different walks of life. the house has always been a band of misfits. quirky in their own way, with wildly varied interests and backgrounds. the army of art students; the accountant-turned teacher; the ibanker turned actor; the dog walker who ran off to indonesia to pursue indonesian music; the drug dealer; the hairstylist; the alternate reality game designer; the person who dropped out of med school to find himself; the midwest lawyer trying to find a job after law school.
notably, my mom has always worried that, being on the “private school track”, i would never know what life was like for poor people and miss out on what life is honestly like for a majority of americans; i think that she can successfully retire these concerns. it becomes much harder to dismiss the occupy movement when your housemates are participating in the actual protests or if you have housemates that never plan to be debt free. it gets harder to believe that our system isn’t rigged when the average amount of debt in the house is $30K (slightly lower than average student debt after graduation) and how impossible life and economic mobility is when you are working minimum wage jobs.
why keira knightley lives on a $50K annual budget: “I think living an expensive lifestyle means you can’t hang out with people who don’t live that lifestyle,” she says. “It alienates you. Some of my best, most hilarious times have been in the least luxurious places.” via
…excited for what the future has in store. excited to live with daniel, excited to not have to trek back and forth from two places, excited to live in a “nice” place.
…sad. sad to say goodbye. sad to see things end. saying goodbye always creates a huge hole in my heart. it’s been a good run. the paths our lives take are driven by so many things, and i feel incredibly grateful that 736 and craigslist were a part of this.
anyway. that is why i always push for craigslist randoms.
i know it’s a bit late for me to post this, but i guess it gives me an opportunity to provide some thoughts three months after the fact.
as much as i always underestimate how much goodbyes pain me, i also forget how durable people are and how quickly i am to focus on the moment/the future. i’m glad i have the blog to capture my past. there are pros and cons to the current living situation, as there always tends to be… but that is a blog post for another day.