mason/wayne were over and we spontaneously decided to watch “her” (instead of star trek, thank god) as a nice, cold, saturday, ended-up-being-double date-y, highbrow, unwinding movie. [spoilers]
i really enjoyed it (despite falling asleep (i blame the food coma and alcohol and being nestled under a blanket on a cold night) (but just finished rewatching the ending)). poignant, imaginative, relatable—i give it 8.5 slices of cheese pizza out of 10.
1) yes, it’s about a guy who falls in love with an AI. which, from the previews, i would have guessed would have been the hardest sell of the movie, met by judgmental, ludditic scoffs—but it honestly came so easy to the movie as i was enraptured by that sweet, playful, raspy scarlett johansen from her first conversation with joaquin phoenix. (okay maybe the sex scene was a littttle bit weird for me. both.) ”what defines a relationship?” asks the movie. the saying “there’s no such thing as fake pleasure—pleasure is pleasure” comes to mind. companionship? joy? something that you love? something that encourages you to grow? dependability? stability? creation of moments of emotional intensity?
2) those flashbacks. that last phone message. people enter and exit your life, and while those relationships don’t last, the memories do last. and we hold on to them. and we are grateful for them. and the people that created them with us. and this movie was such a great reminder, such a paean to living in the past.
3) it works really well as a sci fi movie. how cool would it be to live in such a technologically proficient world? AIs with personalities, natural language processing. singularity!!! (though, yes, the online handwritten letters business was sort of creepy. but they still have books!!!! how novel *zing!*)
4) people grow and change in relationships sometimes. the amount of luck required for two people who are a good match for each other to FIND each other is mindboggling. but not even from a “bumping into someone” perspective, but from a time perspective as well-we change so much throughout our lives, and to happen to find your significant other when each of your “versions” are compatible—beating both space and time serendipity requirements sometimes scares me. BUT HEY, at least once you find each other, people generally grow/change in lockstep.
…but it’s scary when one person grows faster than another. and the singularity metaphor where the OS was becoming exponentially smarter while teddy was just… being human was extremely powerful. you can hardly blame samantha for wanting to leave teddy. the movie did make me hug daniel a little bit harder that night though…. ❤
Samantha: It’s like I’m reading a book… and it’s a book I deeply love. But I’m reading it slowly now. So the words are really far apart and the spaces between the words are almost infinite. I can still feel you… and the words of our story… but it’s in this endless space between the words that I’m finding myself now. It’s a place that’s not of the physical world. It’s where everything else is that I didn’t even know existed. I love you so much. But this is where I am now. And this who I am now. And I need you to let me go. As much as I want to, I can’t live your book any more.
Theodore: Dear Catherine, I’ve been sitting here thinking about all the things I wanted to apologize to you for. All the pain we caused each other. Everything I put on you. Everything I needed you to be or needed you to say. I’m sorry for that. I’ll always love you ‘cause we grew up together and you helped make me who I am. I just wanted you to know there will be a piece of you in me always, and I’m grateful for that. Whatever someone you become, and wherever you are in the world, I’m sending you love. You’re my friend to the end. Love, Theodore.