2013 in review – a year in complacency

pmc asked me what i had done in 2013.  and i thought for a really long time, and the most significant thing i came up with was something that i actually did in 2012.  whooops

all things said, i have really few things to show for 2013.  for a variety of reasons.  mostly because i really just didn’t have any goals.  generally, i was really happy with how things were from a social, professional, romantic, active, etc. perspectives, and didn’t really feel the need to hit certain accomplishments.  i guess a starkly different zen perspective compared to the life dashboards i used to do.  man, i used to do such a crazy amount of goal setting.

ANYWAY.  i have other excuses for why 2013 was generally unproductive:

  • it’s really hard to get anything done when you need to coordinate with a significant other
  • being in a relationship takes up a lot of time/can be incredibly draining
  • relationship milestones and progress (of which there were several) cannot be accurately documented
  • by far the most difficult year i’ve had from a health perspective (thank god for moving from a high deductible plan to an hmo)

Disney Pixar Up – Picture Momentos – Carl & Ellie (though pleaseee don’t watch if you haven’t seen the movie) (omg i definitely found the video after watching “5 saddest pixar moments” video where i definitely teared up)

as everyone knows, up was one of the things that resolved my existential crisis.  and one of the many wise takeaways from the movie was that adventures don’t necessarily have to be epic, that a meaningful life is not a long list of accomplishments, that spending time with the people you love is the most important.  and this year i just took it to heart and just enjoyed people instead of fighting to make new friends or break my body hitting physical goals or tripping over myself to study.

in terms of “greatest hits” of 2013, i generally don’t really like the idea just because honestly just because some of my favorite, favorite memories are also the most forgettable.  like a really great work lunch or hanging out with mark in his living room playing computer games or going to costco with daniel or getting drunk with gays at the castro, those are really some of my favorite moments of the year.  but can’t be captured by that sort of breakdown, unfortunately.

anyway.  here goes a random smorgasbord of 2013 things!  an asterisk* denotes favorites. 


best things

  • Gay happy hours and Thai House Express
  • Angeles’s Berkeley play-it-by-ear birthday and birth of cigar sunday
  • *Bootie sillydancing with the Outfield/Calvin Harris Your Love mashup
  • *Conapanioning and Walking Dead and Portal with Mark
  • Circuit parties
  • *Bootie nugget toasting with Mark and Kathy
  • DASH5 around SOMA with Justin, Mason, and Jon
  • Elevate Puzzle Hunt in Santa Clara with Jon/Stacey
  • Fancy Alexander’s Steakhouse meal via Jyoti
  • Roots/Daffo and chicken lollies/meals with Mark
  • Bubbloonacy/House of Air birthday festivities
  • Stanford Reunion
  • Paintballing
  • HOPR for Mark’s birthday
  • Completing Journey to the End of the Night
  • Angeles’s Lasagna/sobremesa night
  • Keith R’s house party
  • Beating Diablo inferno mode
  • 1-yr Improv/Fort Mason and Tourist Club Hike
  • Aquarium by the bay date
  • SF Symphony Tchaik Concert surprise
  • Dance classes
  • Treasure Island 7/4 bbq
  • vicariously living through daniel’s improv classes, scuba trip, and cigar sundays at the banya
  • costco trips with daniel
  • specialty’s cookie BBM spontaneous mark/angeles/james meetup


  • Generally stayed fit (running after work, climbing, lunch workouts) and built muscle mass (but i could affort to be more disciplined)
  • Made some movie montages that i really like
  • Setting the record escape time for Real Escape Room
  • Took an FSA exam and finished two modules
  • Consolidated financial brokers and came up with a more productive investment plan


  • Tahoe (Pride and Philipp)
  • Davis (to see Sunny/Jacob)
  • Lemons races at Sonoma
  • Family meetup in Chicago
  • SOA Health Conference/Michael in Baltimore
  • Grant’s wedding in Houston
  • *EDC! (day 1: acclimatization, 2: dancing in line/mercy, 3: sickness/funnelcake/elvis)
  • Hawaii with family
  • *LA for Jennie’s Wedding/John
  • Boston for Thanksgiving
  • Xmas in Atlanta

bad things

  • Pretty serious health problems (including daniel’s), including two major stomach bouts (but generally got through it)
  • Gay tumblr drama/the night of 4 parties with hoshang
  • House is much less fun.  Zach Hazen and Margaret left 736, and I chose problem housemate Jonas. Ebis and Mars issues reach fever pitch (police visits, physical abuse)
  • Mark leaves SF (but the goodbye festivities were fun); 330 ritch, the only hip hop club i know, also shuts down due to a shooting, leaving a bucket list item forever unchecked

notable things

  • Dogpatch opened/Met Nick at GWPC
  • Got into Chipotle
  • Hosted Sandie and Huy in San Francisco
  • The Oakland Gay Lunch Group
  • Walked in the Pride parade
  • BART strike
  • B2B
  • Sweet Cheat
  • Started going to TAC
  • Kaiser Actuarial run club aka RATL (running around the lake)
  • Urbanathlon/Nike Run Club/Divis Up or Shut Up

new friends

  • Tim
  • Justin DLC
  • Sean H. (unrelated to the ex)
  • Coworkers (Kathy et al… but generally unfocused between Colleen, Vashti, Daniel, Jennie, Sidney)

strengthened friendships

  • Jon
  • Mason


  • *21 Jump Street
  • World War Z
  • Silver Linings Playbook
  • Mission Impossible: 4
  • Pacific Rim
  • Elysium
  • Die Hard film series
  • Catching Fire
  • Star Trek into Darkness
  • Koyaanisqatsi
  • Man of Steel
  • The Conjuring
  • The Heat
  • The Purge


  • *Orange is the New Black
  • *Orphan Black
  • *Veep
  • *Happy Endings
  • The Mindy Project
  • Girls
  • Misfits
  • Damages
  • Breaking Bad (Final Season)
  • Survivor (Blood vs. Water, with the semi-villain Tyson beating Ciera and Hayden, and John/Candice’s Peeta/Katniss, the rock draw)
  • Elementary
  • Enlightened
  • House of Cards
  • American Horror Story: Asylum
  • The Challenge: Rivals II (Paula and Emily beat Cooke and Cara!)
  • Hannibal
  • So You Think You Can Dance (Fikshun and Amy)
  • Broadchurch
  • Party Down
  • Bob’s Burgers
  • Community
  • Parks and Rec
  • Modern Family
  • New Girl
  • Masters of Sex


  • Monaco
  • Ghost Hacker
  • *Kingdom Rush Frontiers
  • Diablo 3
  • Qoosh
  • Walking Dead
  • Incursion 2
  • Plants vs Zombies 2
  • Ninja Slash
  • Obliterate Everything
  • Clicking Games (Clicking Bad, Cookie Clicker, Merry Clickmas)
  • Creeper World
  • Frantic 2
  • Jelly Go

2014 resolutions

but yes, while complacency is the best, i suppose complacency is also the worst.  so here are my 2014 goals:

  • pass one FSA exam
  • become more proficient at work/be more ambitious
  • learn how to be more productive/effective/FOCUSED at working (both professionally and personally)
  • strive to be a better boyfriend/relationship-specific goals and aspirations not suitable for public consumption
  • do more blogging/improve ohlife tagging
  • move in with daniel
  • climb at a v4 level and look better physically
  • develop non-daniel relationships
  • covet/stalk less

i know many are not SMART (specific measurable achievable realistic timely) but………. yeah.  phew.  cannot believe i used to do stuff like this quarterly.  until next year!


2 thoughts on “2013 in review – a year in complacency

  1. phenothebest says:

    man, no trip to LA and Chinese buffet with me! grrrrr

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