ugh, facebook


cute.  actually don’t know the last one.  definitely engaged in some sloth over winter break as i watched THE ENTIRE FIRST SEASON OF DAMAGES WITH MY MOM ON NETFLIX, which was absolutely incredible and i could not do anything but sit there and watch episode after episode after episode.  ellen parsons!!!  anyway.  

heartslap worthy

from a post on guy’s wall by girl: Headed to sunny San Diego with Peeta! — with guy at SFO
friend: lol, peeta.
guy: haha yep…now you look at that book in a completely different way huh
friend: Well, he acted one way before he was hijacked and another way after he was hijacked. I’m wondering which she thinks is closer to you.
guy: probably the charming, handsome, brave one….yeaaaa
girl likes guy’s comment
girl: You’re a bit lacking in the bread department, but otherwise an A+ Peeta. 🙂


not at all a fresh perspective but hbr blog – facebook is making us miserable. (2nd and 3rd points i don’t necessarily agree with)

First, it’s creating a den of comparison. Since our Facebook profiles are self-curated, users have a strong bias toward sharing positive milestones and avoid mentioning the more humdrum, negative parts of their lives. Accomplishments like, “Hey, I just got promoted!” or “Take a look at my new sports car,” trump sharing the intricacies of our daily commute or a life-shattering divorce. This creates an online culture of competition and comparison. One interviewee even remarked, “I’m pretty competitive by nature, so when my close friends post good news, I always try and one-up them.”

Comparing ourselves to others is a key driver of unhappiness. Tom DeLong, author of Flying Without a Net, even describes a “Comparing Trap.” He writes, “No matter how successful we are and how many goals we achieve, this trap causes us to recalibrate our accomplishments and reset the bar for how we define success.”And as we judge the entirety of our own lives against the top 1% of our friends’ lives, we’re setting impossible standards for ourselves, making us more miserable than ever.

i…. empathize.  going into break, i was actually feeling pretty good about life!  but i don’t know, some place along the way, my perception of the world starting cracking.  and while i’m now quite confused on and frustrated with several aspects of my life, people on facebook just seem so TOGETHER and HAPPY and being cute with a +1 or making friends with all the people i want to be friends with and doing all the things that i want to be doing and looking awesome all the ways i want to look awesome.  and it somehow culminated in me coming across a facebook photo that rendered me helpless for like half an hour.  that can’t be healthy, right?  okay, sort of ridiculous.  NOT LIKE I’M GOING TO QUIT FACEBOOK or i have any modicum of self-discipline not to indulge this obsession.  i’ll figure something out. 

Facing the harsh reality of returning to work after an amazing weekend in Napa with my guy.

i want to be someone’s guy.  that has got to be the best gay petname. 

went home, learned that a high school smart bro guy who i had a minor crush is actually gay!  and might have not found me repulsive in high school!  and he now lives a bro life with his ex-military bf in their house with their dog and they run races and paint walls together and go on family/gay vacations together. 


me to him: would be fun to debrief at some point though. perhaps the next time i see you! whenever that will be. (if i’m allowed to comment) (and if this doesn’t make me sound too much like a creeper) you and [guy] look quite cute together. glad everything turned out 🙂

him: yeah happy to catch up whenever! But yes feel free to comment…no more secrets in my life. And thank you – I’m happy with him 🙂

i have this one random story from prom, where he comes up to me, and he goes, “JAMES, HOW ARE YOU!??!?!?” and then headed off.  and i looked at my date, and i go, “man, he’s NEVER been that nice to me, i wonder why!” (secretly really happy inside, i’m sure) and she looks at me like i’m an idiot and goes, “yeah, he was definitely drunk, james.” oh past james.  what am i going to do with you. 

TC – What 20-Something Has Their Dream Job And Dream Relationship?

touches on the two major axes most 20somethings judge their/others’ lives on.  is pursuing a job mutually exclusive with pursuing your career? (yes and no.) are you a failure if you have neither a relationship nor your dream job?  (yes.) (okay, jokingggggggggg)

TC – Don’t Wake Up Alone On A Saturday Morning

one of those hyper-emo, hyper-dramatic ryan o’connell entries.

You woke up on a Saturday and came to the sudden realization that you were all alone, that everything you had surrounded yourself with Monday through Friday, all the happy hours and all the business lunches and all those technological noises you drenched your earbuds in: it all added up to zero. You feel like a fool, don’t you? You played the game like everyone asked you to and still managed get to this place of complete and utter loneliness and alienation. Where did you go wrong? Do you need to send another text message to someone? Do you need to pay another credit card off or have another Great Night Out? What can you do to feel more connected to the things around you?

man, imagine being in that mindset and browsing facebook. 


One thought on “ugh, facebook

  1. […] facebook! i know i’ve written about this already, but it seems topical and i found some more stuff today about it and there were some add on points, […]

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