things that frustrate me – gay culture

gary – geordie shore (like the UK version of jersey shore)

that’s the most important thing—looking good, and pulling women. 

sort of wish someone that attractive was on jersey shore.  fuck!

ever since the breakup with chris, i’ve been attempting to “break into” gay culture/just getting comfortable with that side of me.  both because that would make meeting gay people so much easier, but just because i have been overdue for the personal journey.

as i spend more time with gay people/at gay events,

gay people really care a lot about looks.  okay, they also care about money and youth, but basically, they care about looks.  and while it is immensely frustrating if you aren’t born with beautiful x, y, z, it also is frustrating because who wants to be friends with ugly people, in which case, how do even make friends unless someone finds you attractive.  on the one hand, it’s weird and gross and frustrating and vapid and pathetic and people are always on the prowl for something better; on the other hand… a six-pack is a six-pack.  (I’m not going to deny that I’m not just as bad as everyone else)

When I was 21 someone told me there is nothing worse in gay culture than to be old with one exception old and poor is worse. –howl

I talk about this with tall patrick sometimes (and me and howl), and it’s really scary because this sort of thinking is totally unsustainable!!  you just end up this single, old, washed up dude who nobody else will think twice about. who maybe pays people to “carry luggage” for him or whatnot.

anyway.  gay club dynamics are different from straight club dynamics.  which don’t get me wrong, also have really weird things going on as well.

takeaway being… gotta look the best I can!??!  (yes, yes, don’t be so vain, got it……..)

it’s so hard to meet young, gay people.  is it?!  anyway.  fuck.  particularly hard to meet gay guys who aren’t very gay.

(more so something that I am frustrated at about myself) when I see gay couples, particularly those who I perceive as being similar to me/those that I would be attracted to (which again, I believe as being super rare), that makes me immensely sad/jealous.  wonder what I’m doing wrong; wonder what’s wrong with me; wonder I will have a chance to date someone like that.

again, my mantra is “live to fight another day” in this situation, am working on a game plan and reallocating my time (and heart) accordingly.



craigery morgan – who looks super butch, but all his videos are just of him lip syncing to girls parts in various skits.  what?!

i love it when really buff guys wear glasses.  hah. was this just an entry an excuse to post photos of shirtless guys?!  okay, I promise I actually have a wide breadth of guys that I’m attracted too, despite the fact that the two people above are basically twins.


One thought on “things that frustrate me – gay culture

  1. Patrick says:

    of course, i agree with the vapidity comments, but i’d like to believe that not *everyone* is on the prowl for something better. there are gay guys out there who realize that the keys to a successful, enriching ltr aren’t six-packs. although… they are hard to find. maybe they’re the more “average” looking ones!

    sadly, i generally agree with your takeaway… although i’d say a large proportion of straight people tend to feel the same way. (young women/magazines, etc etc) i guess gay culture is just more overt and unapologetic about it.

    ideally, the takeaway should be… i should accept myself for who i am, do my best, and find someone who loves me in spite of (or because of) all my flaws. i’ll let you know when i’m able to do that… in the meantime, back to the strength training program 🙂

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